Cut and run

If I die young bury me on satin, lay me down on a bed of roses. Sink me on a river at dawn. Send me away with the words of a love song.

I thought it was gone, that I would never gonna feel that way again. I was wrong.
I'm confused and it hurts. I don't know if it's jelousy, the feeling of emptiness, frustration, angry...
I don't know what the hell it is, I don't know how to deal with it, not even a little idea.
What do I want? Be closer. Why do I feel so far away? Maybe because it is what it is. Is there any way to fix it? Yeah, maybe. Are those things that bother you gonna stop you from getting what you want? Honestly, don't think so. If I've learned something about this situations is that if I let my feelings guide myself I'm gonna end up my way stuck in the wall. If I let my instincts control myself i won't get anywhere. If I don't take the time to think I'll just cut and run.
Yes, it does hurt. Yes, it won't be different until I make it different, until I fight for it, until I give all i have for it.
Is it worth it? I don't know.
Am I gonna try it anyway? Yes of course. I've lost thousands of times, enough times to know that for the first time of my life it won't be like that again. Not this time.
But what makes this time different? I'm aware. Aware of the world, aware of everything that surrounds me. I don't care if it makes me hesitate about everything. I don't care if it makes me go crazy, if it makes me reconsider half of the things I think I know, I don't care.
I really don't.
I'm brave
I'm strong
I believe
And I'm going to be fearless

Time stand still.Time has brought your heart to me. One step closer. One step closer.

I have died every day waiting for you. I'll love you for a thousand more.

I don't want to feel lost, I don't want to be afraid, I don't want to be alone. If it completes me then I'll go for it. If it makes me happy I will give my everything for it.
And everything that comes with it?

It will be fine.